2009 Predictions

Predictions for 2009?

This pleb will still continue to stalk me. I will continue to not notice him there, and on the off chance that I do, I will realise ten hours later who that weirdo with the big ears, (and blacked out car windows with a girlfriend who's head and shoulders are about twice the size of him )ACTUALLY. Do you know your woman is about twice the size of you? TWAT!

Er, yeah..ok then. Well the saga will obviously continue until 2009, hopefully he'll FUCK RIGHT OFF the year after then. Even better HOPE YOU FUCKING DIE YOU FUCKWIT! Choke on some chickpeas.

2009 Predictions

Geriatric Annie Lennox decided to air some 'predictions' for the new year. Something about World Catastrophe...then she said 'durr' as if she was trying to say that we all can't state the obvious.

Shame she can't predict her pathetic record sales in the same way. Annie Lennox = Bad record sales. Durr.

Keep trying Annie, eventually the charity work will pay off. Happy New Year, hope you all have a shit one!!!

Queen Shaherazaad breaks her silence

Attention All

This is a public announcement to state that Queen Shaherazaad has broken her silence once again and annihilated once again the world's favourite Dickhead also known as Adil Ray.

Type in http://gb.uclue.de/8420925.html to see the comments from our amazing Queen.

Long live the Queen!

Chickpeas off the MENU : Part 2

Shaherazaad says : I did not, I repeat did not have 'chickpeas' for breakfast this morning. It was a plate of saag, honest.

Chickpeas : JUST SAY NO!

Shaherazaad says : I just hate chickpeas, don't you? Just thought i'd put up another CHICKPEA image to state my opinion.

Chickpeas are definately OFF the Menu

Chickpeas. Definately off all verbal/mental menu's until further notice.

Don't mention the chickpeas! Anything but the chickpeas!

Attention All

Adil Ray (Slaphead and general Dickhead) is going through a tender stage at the moment, since the departure of 'MOPHEAD'.

In light of recent developments, can EVERYBODY please refrain from mentioning, eating or debating the 'chickpea' phenomenom due to the unbelievable distress this is causing him. Although this is a great thing, due to his chronic drug habit there are widespread fears he might go over the edge. Yes, I know this is a 'good thing' and why stop a good thing I hear you all cry?

I just want to say that mentioning chickpeas, brings back a lot of memories of him and wife number 700002. Just the sight of one methane rich bullet of chickpea brings romantic memories which he's rather not address at this very painful and distressing time. The first time he heard her squarking laughter, the first time he mopped the kitchen with her great (and very straightened) mop of hair, the first time she pretended she wasn't up for it (like the other girls), and of course her tinned soup.

Now, back to work. Although this brings everyone a huge amount of joy, (especially Shaherazaad) please keep the chickpea jokes postponed for the meantime, and until further notice.

On behalf of all Pakistani comedians, I would like to apologise on behalf of the 'ignorance' of my people, and their low brow and frankly quite ignorant jibes about 'village' life, and it's indiginous peoples, and their indiginous ways.

So it's poori and halva tomorrow morning for a swish Sunday brunch. Chickpeas are most definately off the menu.

Bungle in the Jungle!

Remind you of anyone? ........................................ (think the walking around naked bit is a bit of a major giveaway)

'BUNGLE
Often described as an annoying six-foot, cross dressing bear, Bungle was always so self righteous, it's amazing that Zippy didn't slap him. However, judging by the ever changing appearance of the bear, it could be assumed that successive ursine do-gooders were dragged in as replacements when things got a little too hot for their predecessors. The perpetual school sneak, Bungle was always first in the queue to blame someone else (normally the Zipmeister) when things went wrong. The Jar-Jar Binks of the Rainbow household, Bungle is probably most famous for wandering around naked by day, only to pull on a pair of blue and white striped jimjams when it was time to climb the wooden ladder to Bedfordshire.
Character Most Likely To: End up amongst the foundations of Heathrow Terminal Five.'

An excerpt taken from ''www.btinternet.com/~acbarrett/bungle.htm''...found when googling the word'' Bungle''.

Raja No 1 says : TOE SUCKING: IT'S A LIFECHOICE!